GLADY TSIKATA-AHIABU FUNERAL VIDEO

OUR GRATITUDE IS BEYOND MEASURE!

When we left our various stations to travel to Ghana for Gladys' funeral three weeks ago, it was with a heavy heart and a lot of emotion that our journeys began. Today, after our return to our various stations, I can confidently report that every one of us has a little smile on our faces, gratified that our family truly did honor to our beloved Gladys.

I am not sure I have the words to adequately describe what happened back home. For me personally, I left the shores of Ghana feeling very proud of my family and my heritage indeed. I am sure the rest of us are feeling the same, and Gladys herself must be smiling on all of us right now. It is said that when preparation meets organization and execution, SUCCESS happens. That is precisely what our family did for Gladys' funeral and you had a feeling that it is great to belong to a great family. The amount of preparation that went into this funeral showed in the results. The execution was superb and the dedication to duty by family and friends was outstanding!

Nothing was more overwhelming than the multitude of family and friends who made sure they attended this funeral. It was touching to see them all. It spoke volumes of who Gladys truly was, and it was true testament to her character and values when she was here. Yes, success has many fathers, defeat is an orphan: Gladys had many fathers at her funeral and it is proof positive that she was truly a success when she was here.

Our family is forever grateful to all of you who helped in diverse ways to bring this funeral to its logical conclusion. To the Monsignor and the Reverend fathers and sisters who participated in the entire funeral, we thank you! Torgbuiwo, Mamawo, and the traditional and cultural participants, your presence and participation truly highlighted our rich culture and tradition, and you made our family very proud indeed. We thank you profusely from the bottom of our hearts! To the Headmaster of Keta Secondary School, thank you, Sir, for your generosity to our family.

To friends and family, it is your donations and your willingness to volunteer your time and effort to help us in so many ways that left everyone commenting on how very well organized this funeral was. The credit truly goes to you all. You made all this possible and our gratitude to you is overflowing. Gladys herself must be feeling very good and proud right now. To God Almighty be the glory!

From the Tsikata, Attipoe and the Ahiabu families, we thank you all so very much!!!

OUR FINAL TOUCHES TO LAY GLADYS TO REST....

This is the weekend when those of us from abroad are breezing into town from various parts of the world. My sister Lucy is flying from Atlanta, Georgia, and my brother John is leaving from London, England. Gladys' daughter, Akpene and her husband Mark, are departing from Portland, Oregon. Eli, Gladys' son, is making the trip from San Jose, California, and Makafui, Gladys' daughter, is traveling from Frederickton, Canada. My flight is from Los Angeles and I doing something I have never done before purely in memory of my sister, Gladys: I am flying through the beautiful city of Dubai, just to have a peek and keep that memory with me while I make my journey to say goodbye to my beloved sister. I am going by Emirates Airlines. Makafui is following my footsteps too.

So far, we've come a long way in making all the arrangements for a fitting burial for Gladys. Our family home in Keta will be the central location for all the activities. The headmaster of Keta Secondary School, where Gladys was once a teacher, has been very generous to our family, offering the school grounds for the funeral reception. The funeral mass will be conducted at the Keta Catholic Mission, the very mission where Gladys attended her primary and middle schools. The burial will be at Srogboe, our home town. It feels like coming full circle indeed, taking her right where she started life as a kid growing up, and resting her home by her Dad, James Caledji Tsikata!

Even though we are all grieving her loss, our family intends to make the funeral a celebration of Gladys' very rich and inspiring life, and we will all be there in our numbers to make it happen. It is in these moments that you truly know those who love and care about you. We have received, and are still receiving, donations from various sources and we are extremely grateful to all the donors. We have also received, and are still receiving, lots of help from friends and relatives who have donated their time in all the arrangements we've made so far and it is proper to register our profound gratitude to them.

As I get on the plane tomorrow Friday, October 23rd, to make the journey back home, I am doing so with very fond memories of my sister when she was here. Those memories are indelible now and I intend to keep them that way.

Yes, I do miss her already!

Brother John's emotional tribute to his sister Gladys....

A LOSS TOO PAINFUL TO BEAR!

The news of Sister Gladys’ death came as shock to me because, barely two weeks ago, she had called me to find out how my family was doing. We talked about other family matters and she asked me to make some enquiries for her.

On the early morning of September 1st, 2009, while I was getting ready to go to work, I had a call from my niece Akpene, which I thought was one of our usual calls to tease each other. I began teasing her by calling her Mrs. Hunstiger, and I could feel that the tone of her voice down the line was not as bubbly as she used to be. I paused for a second and I could hear her sobbing, and then she broke the news of her mother’s death to me. I was speechless for moment and could not believe what I was hearing!

Since that day, I have not been able to control my emotions and thoughts to enable me express how valuable Sister Gladys had been to me. One very remarkable moment was how instrumental she had been in my travel to study in the United Kingdom. I would have preferred Sister Gladys to be alive for me to cheer up today, rather than be writing this tribute to her. What a pain this is to bear!

I had known Sister Gladys since I was a little boy visiting my father at Abutiakope. In those days, it was pride having a powerful and educated sister like herself. She took much interest not only in me, but in my younger brothers as well. In 1985, I was applying for a World Council of Churches Scholarship to study in the United Kingdom when arrangements began to stall. At that time, I needed someone to introduce me to the Catholic Diocese in Ho, to confirm that I was a member. All hopes were fading away, signalling I might be losing that Scholarship. I did not know whom to turn to. A close friend of mine, Willie Foster Sapathy of blessed memory, who knew about Sister Gladys’ involvement in the Catholic church, recommended I contact her. Telephone facilities were not good at the time, so we drove on a motorbike to Hohoe. On arrival, Sister Gladys was absolutely pleased to see me. After delivering my mission, without any hesitation whatsoever, she wrote me a note which I took to the Ho Catholic Diocese.

Sister Gladys’ kindness to me did not end there. When she decided to dispose of some of her real property acquisitions over the years, she enquired of my interest and it shows how much she cared about her family and people close to her. On my most recent visit to Ghana, I called on Sister Gladys in Juapong, as I always did, on May 20^th, 2009, to find out how she was. We talked about various issues and her last advice to me was her plea for me to return home someday. I did not, in my wildest dreams, think that that day would be the last I would see her alive.

Sister Gladys, your passing was too sudden and you have left us, your brothers and sisters, our children and the entire family, in disarray. A mighty oak has fallen. Your passing has left a big vacuum in our family.

Sister Gladys, Hede Nyuie. Mawu Nano Kpliwo!!!

From John Yao Tsikata

GLADYS: CALL TO ETERNITY..........

CALL TO ETERNITY

Togbi Agbesi Awusu II, Awadada of Anlo State; Regent Agbodzie Tsikata, Dufia of Srogboe; Regent Nyaho Tamakloe, Miafia of Anlo State and Dufia of Whuti; Regent Patamia of Srogboe; Regent Tretu of Srogboe; Regent Dzoke of Srogboe; Regent Amegashie Afeku of Keta; Regent Gawu of Whuti; Togbi Dzisam of Nolopi; Mr. Patrick Tsikata, Head of Agbodzie Tsikata Family in Accra; Mr. Godwin Kwashie Anagbo, Stool Father of the Agbodzie Tsikata Family of Srogboe; Gidiglo, Havim and Ziddah Families of Aborlove; Attipoe and Allied Families of Anyako; Ahiabu and Allied Families of Keta and Atiavi; Madam Christine Adzorwode Attipoe, Mother; Bloomfield Dutor Attipoe and The Knights and Ladies of Marshall announce with deep sorrow the sudden death of their Beloved –

(MRL) SISTER GLADYS BEATRICE TSIKATA AHIABU (PGL)

AGED 68

· Former Deputy Volta Regional Director of Education – G.E.S. Ho.
· First District Director of Education Denu, Ketu District.
· Former Principal of St. Teresa’s Teacher Training College, Hohoe.
· Former Teacher, Keta Secondary School, Keta.
· Former Teacher, Keta Business College, Keta.

This sad incident occurred at V.R.A. Hospital, Akosombo, on Tuesday, 1st September, 2009.

FUNERAL ARRANGEMENTS

THERE WILL BE NO WAKE.

LAYING IN STATE AND FILING PAST THE BODY
Saturday, 31st October, 2009, at the residence of the late J. C. Tsikata (Father) at Abutiakope-Keta from 6:30 a.m. to 8:00 a.m.

BURIAL CHURCH SERVICE
Saturday, 31st October, 2009, at St. Michael’s Co. Cathedral, Keta, at 9: 00 a.m.


INTERMENT
At Agbodzie Tsikata and Allied Families Cemetery, Srogboe (near Anloga), Volta Region after the burial church service at Keta.


FUNERAL RITES & POST BURIAL RECEPTION
Saturday, 31st October, 2009, at Keta Senior Secondary School Grounds.

THANKSGIVING SERVICE AT KETA
Sunday 1st November, 2009, at St. Michael’s Co. Cathedral, Keta at 9:00 a.m.

Followed by Family gathering at the residence of the late J. C.Tsikata at Abutiakope-Keta.


MOTHER
Madam Christine Adzorwode Attipoe (Accra)

WIDOWER
Mr. Francis Yaovi Ahiabu (former Administrative Manager of Juapong Textiles Limited and former Hospital Administrator, St. Anthony’s Hospital, Dzodze, Ketu District).

CHILDREN
Mrs. Barbara Akpene Ahiabu Hunstiger, Health Care (U.S.A.); Dr. Stephen Eli Ahiabu, Economist (U.S.A.); Ms. Mary-Anne Woedem Ahiabu, Pharmacist, National T. B. Control Programme (Accra) and Mrs. Josephine Makafui Ahiabu Adda, Management Consultant (Canada).

OTHER CHILDREN
Mr. Raphael Ahiabu , Biotechnologist (Tema); Ms. Rejoice Ahiabu, G.E.S.
(Juapong); Mr. Cornelius Ahiabu, Director, Impact Art Limited (Accra); Ms. Judith Worla Ahiabu, G.E.S. (Accra) and Margaret Mary Akuvi Abliza, Nurse (Ho).

BROTHERS AND SISTERS
Mr. Patrick Tsikata, (Accra); Madam Dzigbordi Tsikata (Ho); Madam Emily Gbabuta Tsikata (Ho); Francis Fogah Tsikata, WO1 rtd. (Accra); Mr. Archibald Kwaku-Boye Tsikata, (Prampram); Mr. Victor Tsikata, (Accra); Mr. Matthew Kwasi Tsikata, Pension Consultant and Maths Educator (USA); Mr. Gideon Kwaku Tsikata, Economist, University of Ghana (Legon); Mrs. Lucy Abla Tsikata-Adams (U.S.A.); Mrs. Paulina Tsikata-Dsani, Immediate Past CEO, Women’s World Banking and Former Senior Staff, Standard Chartered Bank (Accra); Mr. Wisdom Tsikata, Deputy Commissioner ( Internal Audit ), CEPS (Accra); Mr. Sylvanus Tsikata (Accra); Mr. Peter Atsu Tsikata, Real Estate Consultant (USA); Mr. Paul Tsey Tsikata, Media Consultant (Accra); Madam Mabel Tsikata, Nurse, Government Hospital (Sogakope); Madam Susana Aku Tsikata, G.E.S. (Denu); Mr. John Tsikata ( U.K.); Dr. Richard Tsikata, Municipal Government Hospital (Ho); Madam Felicia Tsikata (Accra); Mr. Gabriel Sokpoli Tsikata, (Accra) and Mr. Justice Lawluvi, Contractor (Accra).

COUSINS
Captain ( Rtd.) Kojo Tsikata (Accra); Madam Luluvi Tsikata ( Keta ); Major (Rtd.) David Tsikata (Tema); Mrs. Margaret Afi Tsikata (Tema); Mr. Fui Tsikata (Accra); Mr. Tsatsu Tsikata (Accra); Mr. Tsidi Tsikata (USA); Mrs. Egi Tsikata Gaisie (Accra); Ms. Getsa Tsikata (Kumasi); Ms. Doe Tsikata (Accra ); Mr. Dotse Tsikata (Tunisia); Madam Akweley Dartey (Anloga) and Sister; Mr. Doe Nyamasekpor (Accra), Brothers and Sisters; Mr. Michael Kwame Attipoe (Accra), Brothers; Dr. (Mrs.) Chloris Adadevoh (Accra); Mrs. Innocentia Tsikata (Switzerland); Dr. (Mrs.) Edith Clarke (Accra); Mad. Viva Attipoe (London) Brothers and Sisters; Mad, Philomena Attipoe ( Accra ), Mr. Raymond Attipoe ( U.K. ) and Sisters, Mr. Frank Kpodo (U.S.A.); Brothers and Sisters.

NEPHEWS AND NIECES
Mr. Leonard Korku Tsikata (Accra) and Brother; Mr. Sena Yao Tsikata (Accra) Brothers and Sisters; Ms. Joan Atsupi Seshie (Denu), Brother and Sisters; Mr. Kofi Kafu Tsikata (Accra), Brothers and Sisters; Mr. Gabriel Kwasi Tsikata (Accra); Mad. Pearl Tsikata (USA); Ms. Esinam Tsikata (USA) and Brothers; Dr. Dzordzi Tsikata (University of Ghana Legon), Brother and sisters; Mr. Adodo Kofi Tsikata (Accra), Brother and Sisters; Mr. Dela Tsikata (University of Ghana Legon), Brother and Sisters; Mrs. Belinda Adams-Blagogee (Accra), Brothers and Sisters; Messrs. Mawuena and Marie Amegashie (Accra); Mrs. Muina Dsani Wosornu (Accra) and Brothers; Mr. Senanu Dagadu (Accra) and Brother; Mr. Anthony Mawuli Tsikata (USA) and Sisters; Mr. Emmanuel Adodo Tsikata and Brothers (Accra); Mr. Senyo Kofi Tsikata (Accra); Mr. Carl Tsikata (London), Brothers and Sisters; Mr. Julius Kwaku Tsikata (Koforidua), Brothers and Sisters; Mr. Patrick Kwasi Afortude (Asamankese), Brothers and Sisters; Mr. Carl Kuetsidzo (Accra), Brothers and Sisters; and others.



SONS AND DAUGHTER IN-LAW
Mr. Mark Hunstiger (USA); Mr. Patrick Adda (Canada); Mrs. May Bakah Ahiabu (USA).


CHIEF MOURNERS
Regent Agbodzie Tsikata (Dufia of Srogboe); Agbodzie Tsikata and Allied Families Union (Accra); Gidiglo, Havim and Ziddah Families (Aborlove), Mr. Patrick Tsikata; Mr. Godwin Kwashie Anagbo; Dumega Moses Kwakuvi
Tsikata (Anloga); Mr. Edwin Kwasi Glover (Accra); Madam Charlotte Abordahi Tsikata (Accra); Mrs. Annie Tsikata (Accra); Lt. Col. ( Rtd. ) Noah Gidiglo ( Accra ), Brothers and Sisters ; Major (Rtd.) Hubert Atsu Afeku (Srogboe); Mr. Francis Segbedzi (Accra), Brothers and Sisters;
Madam Agnes Yawo Ahiabu Gakpe (Accra); Mr. Clemence Kosi Ahiabu (Accra); Mrs. Agatha Ahiabu Gidisu (Sogakope); Madam Victoria Ahiabu Ashigbie (Woe); Mr. and Mrs. David Adda (Tamale) Mr. and Mrs. Ferguson Bakah (Akosombo) ; Madam Florence Ocloo (Accra); Madam Charity Semevo (Accra); Mr. Livingston Ocloo (Accra); Mr. Dotse Afeku (Accra); Dumega Ezah Tsikata (Srogboe); Dumega Dekakpui Borlu (Srogboe); Dumega Tsimenu Attipoe (Srogboe); Dumega Kwablavi Kudzor (Srogboe); Dumega Fogah Zagbede Attipoe (Keta); Madam Victoria Amegashie (Keta); Madam Faustina Titi Ocloo (Accra); Mrs. Esi Fiakpornu (Accra); Mr. Jack Ametepee (Accra); Mad. Bandele Ametepee (Srogboe); Madam Felicia Zowonu-Bruce (Accra); Mrs. Maggie Gadzekpo (Accra), Brothers and Sisters; Mrs. Georgina Garr (Accra) Brothers And Sisters; Lt. Colonel ( Rtd.) Noah Gidiglo (Accra), Brothers and Sisters; Mr. Carl Lotsu (Accra) and Sisters; Mrs. Sena Ziddah Owusu-Korkor (Accra), Brothers and Sisters; Mr. Bloomfield Dutor Attipoe , Brothers and Sisters; Mad. Helene Ableworvi Attipoe (Accra); Mad. Victoria Gobe Attipoe (Accra) Madam Juliana Jessie Attipoe (Ho), Brothers and Sisters; Messrs. Patrick (Accra); Madam Atsupi Attipoe (Anyako) and Sisters; Madam Gladys Attipoe (Accra); Mrs. Spendlove Ayele Attipoe (Accra); Madam Honesty Attipoe ( Nsawam ); Mr. Agbenyefia Attipoe (Keta) and Sisters, and Obam Attipoe Family Union.

ATTIRE/DRESS CODE

For Saturday, 31st October, 2009 – Black


ALL FRIENDS AND SYMPATHIZERS ARE CORDIALLY INVITED.

DR. DOTSEVI SOGAH, Gladys' former student, reacts to the shocking news.

Atsu:

I just returned yesterday from Germany where I was on a special joint research program in addition to teaching a short course from September 6-30.

I heard of Gladys' untimely, sudden and totally unexpected passing from Frank Kpodo, I think, almost immediately after Akpene called him with the sad news. Frank and I communicated regularly via Skype while I was in Germany.

You know she taught me English literature in Form 4. Besides, because I was living at Abutiakope in my in-laws' (Fiawornu's) house at that time, I saw her regularly as the Tsikata house was one of our gathering places. In addition, we overlapped at Legon. She was the person who introduced Josef Amuzu and me to Volta Hall by inviting us to visit a few times in early 1967. She was also one of the handful (although, frankly, I did not know any other student with a personal TV) that had a personal television in her room even at that time, and Joe and I were quite impressed. I called Josef and related the news to him immediately after Frank told me. He was just as shocked as I was.

From time to time I find myself talking about her and Lucia Amenuvor any time there was a conversation about achievements. The last time was this past August when Lucia said she was retiring. This is because the two received Grade One when they finished form 5 at Holy Child. Because, it was somewhat rare for girls in those days their accomplishments made national news. Even their scholarship to go abroad made the headlines. These things tend to be seared in a young person's mind and I am no different. Lucia just retired last month but still in Virginia. I asked Lotsu Amenuvor to convey the sad news to her cousin.

Atsu, forgive me for my rambling. It's just that I am really saddened by this. You see, when Dzidzorgbe returned from her brother's funeral at Anyako she mentioned to me (and Frank confirmed it) that Gladys was at the funeral and that they were all admiring how well she looked. So to hear just a few weeks later that she is no longer with us is a shock. But I know my shock is nothing compared to yours. All I can tell you is that you and the family will be in my thoughts and prayers for quite some time. Receive my sincerest condolences and, please, convey them to the rest of the family on my behalf. These losses are hard to understand but we just have to let God handle it. He knows why and why now.

Once you know the details of the arrangements, please, let me know.

Ketascho Network: It is perfectly appropriate to announce it to the Ketascho network. It is one of the easiest ways to get the word out to those old students who knew her. Kodzo Gbewonyo is in Ghana and I am sure have already heard about it. He should be getting back shortly.

I will call you. Meanwhile, remain strong.

Dotsevi

BROTHER MATTHEW'S VERY VIVID, FUN MEMORIES OF HIS SISTER GLADYS!

It is very hard to lose a loved one, not only because you will not see them again, but more so when they are relatively young. Some of us have lived to see our parents age gracefully and lived beyond their grand old ages of the eighties and nineties. It is not so this time.

Our beautiful sister Gladys had to leave us with no notice and so suddenly. Despite the emptiness and the abject hurt created, we can only console ourselves with the loving and generous memories that she had threaded when she was with us. For me, at a very prime young age, I learnt that I had a sister called Gladys in a very funny way. I was moved from Adeiso to Keta to live with my maternal grandmother. Within a short time living with my grandmother, I noticed this tall young and beautiful girl who passed through my grandmother’s house, selling tea bread frequently. What struck me instantly was that she always beamed a loving smile at me with her nice set of teeth all showing. And that was not all. She always had samples and, most of the time, whole loaves of tea bread for me. At first, I did not even care who she was as long as I had my tea bread coming in. I finally decided to be inquisitive and asked my grandmother who the ‘tea bread lady’ was. It was then that my grandmother told me the ‘tea bread lady’ was my sister. She went on to advise me that I had many older sisters and brothers who were in high places and I should study hard to emulate them.

As a kindergarten pupil at Keta Roman Catholic School in those days, it made no sense what my grandmother was talking about. I was not interested. All I cared about then was my tea bread. It did not take long before I started noticing sister Gladys at school occasionally, asking about my mother and grandmother in succession. What dawned on me at this early age was that, this was someone who really cared about me!

It didn’t take long before I was transferred to the Bremen Mission School (because my grandmother and mother were forever Presbyterians while our father was catholic) when I was entering the first grade. Since I was transferred, I did not see my sister again that often. In the midst of so much attention on education, as my grandmother stressed so much, I concluded that Gladys was going through the same advice with grandma and that was why she did not frequent my grandmother’s house very often anymore. All I remembered was that our father started coming to our house to talk to my grandmother about something concerning me. It didn’t take long before I was moved again to live with my father in Keta. Even though I was cut off from seeing my favorite sister so often, I was able to fortuitously see her while walking past the Catholic Convent building on my way to pick up the dinner package for our father. This routine went on for several years.

Reaching the age of adolescence made me recognize the essence of reading the daily newspapers. It was on one of those occasions that I read about my sister winning one of the coveted and competitive scholarships offered by the UAC (United Africa Company), the company that our father had retired from as one of their highly productive managers. Though she did not know this, I went to look for her at the ‘Kalamazoo Danger Corner Road House’ to congratulate her. Unfortunately, she was not living there anymore. It was not long before I found out she was at Holy Child Secondary School.

Our contacts got much slimmer because Gladys began spending her holidays with her uncle, Mr. Gilbert Atttipoe (R.I.P.) in Accra or with Mr. Emmanuel Tsikata (R.I.P.) in Adeiso. A few years in-between, I was able to get up and go to look for her at her uncle’s house at Osu. There was another long break in my contact with Gladys until she won a Canadian Government Scholarship to study for her Masters degree in Business Education. Gladys returned to Ghana and started giving of her goodwill by teaching at Keta Secondary School. It was the time of my life that I had fully recognized what Gladys was trying to impart to me and our siblings. I could see all my brothers and sisters flourishing educationally and socially. Atsu was a musician in his school band; Paulina was also at Holy Child Secondary School, while I was at Mawuli School, all of us advancing very well academically. All was well with our many brothers and sisters. At this point, I spent my long school vacations with my maternal uncle in Accra and went to Keta only briefly prior to returning to school.

There was this once most memorable moment when I came to Keta on one of my short visits. It was close to Christmas. Sister Gladys had invited me to come to a faculty party with her. I felt so honored to attend that party with her, more so because it made me feel so respected, and that I was also somebody important. This made me respect her even more. I knew Gladys was very good at ballroom dancing. I still remember the days when she and her boyfriend Dunstan Lasey would go ballroom dancing. Dunstan happened to have attended the same high school as I did. Just from the way this gentleman was so kind and friendly to me, I could sense how he cared about Gladys. It was kind of odd to me, many years ago, that they did not end up together. Up till now, if Dunstan should see me, he would be as warm as ever! But that is the way life goes.

On her first visit to Atsu in Los Angeles several years ago, I specifically requested that sister Gladys stop over in Houston, Texas, to spend at least a week with me and my family. I was very honored to receive her. On another of her visits to Los Angeles, I was able to combine a wedding trip to see her again. Since that last interaction, I had not seen her till this sad end.

For me, there is a big lesson I had never learned until now. It is this: To any loved one that you have anything dear to tell, snatch a special moment to let them know. I have so much to talk to Gladys about but I have lost that opportunity by taking life for granted. Even though this is my personal strategy for avoiding stress in my life, I have learnt to reach out and let the closest people around me know what I honestly feel and what I think about them. From now on, I am resolved to find many ways of opening up to friends and family. Lesson learned!

Dear Gladys, even though I am not privileged to see you again, I take this opportunity to bid you farewell. Thank you for doing the things that made me feel so special and highly cared about. Mawu nanor anyi kpli wo. Xede nyuie!

IT HURTS SO MUCH!.....Paulie's very emotional tribute to her sister Gladys.

Oh! My Sister, why so soon?

Growing up as a little girl, I knew other senior girls both at home and at school, but the only one I looked up to was you, my sister Gladys! In my childhood world, you were my role model and I always followed your footsteps, as you guided me along. We attended the same basic school and you were my senior. We both moved along to the same Senior High School and, thereafter, to the same University. We even did the same course at first degree, after which you diverted to Education and I to Banking.

You were an icon in our family. You were very intelligent and you always excelled in class. Reverend Sister Theodorus of Keta Convent School loved you for your intelligence and good character. So did other Reverend Sisters in Holy Child School, not forgetting Miss Booth, a British tutor. Your intellect earned you a UAC scholarship to support your Senior High School education, and I followed your footsteps as usual with a CMB scholarship. Your good character again earned you the position of school prefect, but in this instance my reward was your little sister getting severely bullied during her first year!

I can still picture you coming from Canada on holidays in 1969, and finally in 1970 after your Masters Degree. You were a beauty, full of life and energy. You held so much promise and potential for future advancement. You were a source of pride and inspiration for all of us. You were the first lady in our family at the time to have reached such a high educational level, even though there were men with similar qualifications. We, your lady siblings, worked hard to be like you. The younger men siblings did not want to be left out either. They followed suit.

In our adult life, two issues always amazed me about you:

1. Your religious life, which made you attend mass daily and hold on strictly to the Catholic teachings.

2. Your extraordinary kind heart, which welcomed every one into your home, as reflected by the large size of your household at Hohoe for 17 years, even though you had only 4 biological children of your own.

You counted neither the material cost nor the emotional cost of such a large household to yourself. You loved every child and brought all up in a religious manner as your own. You were like a big tree, which gave food, shade and protection to every animal that hanged onto your branches. Oh! Did some of us take certain things for granted? Were some of us oblivious to your emotions and your needs? Or was it because the bible teachings went a little off gear and you blindly loved your neighbour more than yourself, without realizing early enough the future adverse effects on you? Did some of us forget to work for your interest and comfort, despite your sacrifices? Did some of us disappoint you by showing signs of ingratitude and lack of appreciation for your sacrifices? O my dear sister, did we misunderstand your enthusiasm for your projects and fail to see the good you stood for? Oh, what was it? What drove you into depression?

My sister, it hurts so much to accept your death. It hurts so much to accept the fact that we, your family members, were far away at the time of your death and, therefore, could not give you any support. We missed your last words. It hurts me personally that I was not there to detect the early signs of the re-onset of the depression, as I did in the past. I could have brought you to Accra again for a change!

We met again in June 2009, but immediately after that, my own bereavement kept me away from Juapong for 2 months prior to your death on 1^st September 2009. I wish you had given me a telephone call to let me know you were unwell. Our Catholic Teachings made you keep your marriage vows for 40 years as at 23^rd August 2009, exactly a week before your death! That day passed quietly. There was no celebration! Not even a word from anyone!

Oh! My sister! You are gone. Who am I to question God about your early departure from this world? My only prayer is to humbly ask God to open the gates of heaven for you. I also need the grace of God to enable me break the news of your death to “Granny", our mother. I believe our mother never in her wildest dreams thought her first born would leave this world before her. You were even planning her 90^th Birthday for next year. It hurts so much as I recollect all these. In my quiet moments, the tears have been flowing. I wish I had understood your emotional problems better than I did . I wish I had been more gentle with you. Oh! Oh! Oh! I wish..... I wish…. But God knows best. May He give you eternal rest. We shall meet one day in eternity.

Baba nawo sia……. Baba nawo loo……… Na dzudzor nam le nutifafa me loo…….

Mia do go le Mawu gbor.

MORE PICTURES OF GLADYS

ORGANIZING GLADYS' FUNERAL....

Unlike the West where funerals are a whirlwind and the dead are buried at lightning speed, funerals in Africa are an elaborate, deliberate, time-consuming process to send of the departed in a dignified fashion. Again, unlike the West where funeral homes play a pivotal role in sending off the dead, in Africa, it is the family of the deceased who organize the logistics of saying goodbye to their departed. How elaborate the ceremonies are solely depends on the family's ability to garner the necessary resources to do honor to their loved one.

So Gladys' funeral is no different from what traditionally takes place in Ghana when someone dies. As I write these notes this Sunday morning, 20 days after Gladys' death, plans are afoot both on the ground in Ghana and also abroad as to how the funeral should be organized. The first family meeting was held eight days ago and a second family meeting will be held in Accra today to discuss the logistics. It is my understanding that various committees have been created and assigned different roles to bring this whole process to its logical conclusion. I am told that I am a member of the committee created to produce a brochure on my sister's funeral, together with my twin-brother, Paul, her son Eli and her daughter Akpene. Others have several other assignments. Those of us abroad have started sending in monies to help the family with the necessary financial resources needed for this whole operation. Gladys' own children have been very instrumental in this effort. We thank them for doing this for their Mama.

The Headmaster of Keta Secondary School, Mr. "Ho Chi Min" Kwawu, has agreed to have the funeral reception on the school grounds to honor Gladys as a former tutor at the school. Our family is profoundly grateful to him for this kind gesture. I am also told that the autopsy on Gladys' body has been performed but it will take a few weeks for conclusive results to be released.

The funeral rites and burial are slated for the weekend of October 30th, 2009. The body will be laid in state at the Tsikata family home at Abutiakope (Keta) and burial will take place at the Tsikata family cemetary at Srogboe, all in the Volta region. Already a team of seven of us strong are planning to fly out from the US and Canada to attend this funeral to honor our beloved Gladys! We pray for travel mercies to undertake this journey.

AND MAKAFUI GRIEVES FOR MAMA.....

My dear mama, your untimely passing has given me the opportunity to reflect more deeply on life, the Christian legacy you gave us, and interpersonal human relationships.The more I think of how you lived your life, the more I grieve that you should pass so soon.

Where is the earthly reward you so much worked hard for? A home to call your own, grandkids to bring you joy and good cheer, kids to share your old age wisdom with, a spouse to share your heart with, the church to be your refuge and all, and all, and all. Mama, whom shall we say Thank You to? What about all the plans you had for the grand kids? Who will spur us on, and on, and on, and on, and on? You demanded excellence and would settle for nothing less. You kept drumming into my head to get a PHD. Mama, may your dream live long, long, long and long. May God bless your plans and thoughts for all your loved ones, and may your legacy live on forever.

Do you remember when I came back home from UK with Welam and your son Patrick? Hmmmmmm, you were all cheers. You gave us seed money to establish an educational fund for Welam. Oh Mama, such was your proactiveness. And it did not matter to you how much you had to give, you gave it anyway. When my husband and I had not yet thought of when Welam was even going to start daycare, you had already a fund in mind to get him started. I remember when you first met Welam. At the time, the little one was simply too scared of your big spectacles. Auntie Babara quickly came to the rescue by sending you a designer pair. We teased you over and over again, and you loved it.

Oh Mama, sweet mother, Mama Boneeeey, Grandma Yoghurt, Woman of substance and passion, Lover of all, may your Saviour grant you eternal rest with him. May memories of your life guide us all to God. I miss you Mama. Never to have the opportunity to speak to you (a telephone distance away) truly breaks my heart. But Mama, its ok, I understand and I thank God for the time he gave us with you. That is enough. We look forward to the eternal life when we will live with you and the whole family for ever. Dada nyuieeee, Hede le nutifafa me. Dzudzor le nutifafa me.

MORE PICTURES OF GLADYS

HOW EMEFA, HER NIECE, FEELS ABOUT GLADYS.

I remember it was about 9:00 p.m. when I called my brother, Mawuli, in LasVegas to check on him, when he broke the news to me that someone had died in the family. My first question was if it was Granny (our grandmother), and when he answered no, I wondered who it could be? He then said Mama, and I asked him thrice to confirm it because I felt it had to be a mistake. It finally sunk in that he was telling the truth because, and besides, I remembered my Dad leaving a message on my phone to call him that night no matter what, which was unusual. I was in disbelief!

I lived most of my childhood with family members, and auntie Gladys was definitely my favorite aunt to stay with. She welcomed us and raised us as her own. My siblings and I still call her Mama. She was God-fearing, kind-hearted and giving. She loved unconditionally and saw the best in everyone. She spent her life caring for others and never put herself before others. She would often go out of her way to help and was an amazing counselor.

The last time I spoke to Mama was earlier this year and I planned on calling her one of these days, but that never came to pass. I didn't get the chance to visit her when I went to Ghana last year, and I remember vividly telling my cousin Esther that I would visit and spend a week with them next year; but God had other plans.

Thank you Mama for all you did for us; for treating us like your own and showering us with love and care. It is time for you to rest. May you continue to rest in eternal peace and guard over us like a guardian angel. I love you and will truly miss you!

Love always,

Emefa Tsikata

LUCY'S VERY TOUCHING LETTER TO HER BELOVED SISTER, GLADYS!

My sister dear,

I am still in great shock and disbelief. Am I dreaming? Is it really true that you have left us all to eternity? This is unbelievable! Why so sudden? Why now? Never in my wildest dreams did I think that I will, this day, be told of your death. It has still not sunk in yet! You have dug a very deep hole in my heart. I feel so lonely. Life is so short!

For all these years, you have been a source of inspiration, joy and pride to all of us. Your beauty, your personality and radiancy, your intelligence, hardwork, honesty, devotion and dedication to the work of God, will forever linger in my mind. Your greatest attribute and special gift from God was your VERY BIG HEART! We, your sibblings, our children, and many, many people were fortunate enough to share your love with you and your children - who never complained. You embraced us all and made each and every one of us feel special, wanted and loved. You were one out of a million! No matter the circumstances, you were always full of smiles, joy and love for us all, and for humanity.

I remember the joy of our parents and us, your sibblings, when you won a full scholarship to the Holy Child Secondary School in Cape Coast. Your excellent performance there up to sixth form impressed everyone, especially the UAC (United Africa Company) executives who had granted you the scholarship in the first place. You were virtually a genius in our eyes and you made us all very proud. Because of your exceptional performance in school, UAC was always ready to buy all your personal needs for school. This was unusual of any company in Ghana and it was a source of pride for us, your family. You carried on this high level of excellence even to the University of Ghana, Legon.

A very special day in your life was no doubt your wedding day, the memory of which is still fresh in my mind. The young, beautiful, slim and radiant Gladys was beaming with smiles, just as we your family members were. Gladys looked very elegant, gorgeous, joyful and pretty! There is a saying that "a thing of beauty is a thing of joy forever". That was exactly how I saw my dear sister Gladys on her wedding day! You carried this joy throughout the greater part of your life, with strength and vigor. I am extremely grateful to God for that.

I also still remember when you were awarded a full scholarship to pursue a Masters' Degree in Business in Canada. After the completion of your course, you again filled our hearts with great joy, bringing back along with you your beautiful newborn baby girl, Barbara. On arrival at the airport, you were beaming with smiles, just as we also were, seeing the two of you!

During my difficult times in life, you stood solidly by my side. Even when I left Ghana to teach in Nigeria, you embraced my children, welcomed them into your home, and showed them great motherly love. You taught them how to pray unceasingly and trust in the Lord. It was through your relentless efforts that my children received their Baptism, Holy Communion and Confirmation. What a wonderful, caring, precious and loving sister you were. Thank you very much, Sister Gladys. I feel very lucky and proud to have you as my sister! You were very instrumental in my return from Nigeria to Ghana, and in re-instating me back into the GhanaTeaching Service. I am forever grateful for that!

My dear Gladys, as a result of your enormous sacrifices, hardwork and unceasing love, your children and your siblings' children have achieved tremendous success in life. We are extremely grateful and will forever cherish this. This is the time for you to reap and enjoy the fruits of your great labor, and it is unbelievable that the icy hands of death have just snatched you away from us so suddenly. Why this, why so soon and why so suddenly? Oh, how we your siblings and your precious children miss you and yearn to hear your voice over and over again!

In appreciation for all your love and care, your children have built you a very beautiful house at Juapong and you were actually preparing to move into this home by Christmas. But death has stopped this move in its tracks! Death has taken you away from us! Hardly can we comprehend the deeds of God the Almighty! He knows best why He has called you to eternity. May the Angels in heaven keep you safe and give you maximum rest, peace and joy that you so much deserve. I will, forever, cherish the very good and exemplary life you led on earth and, above all, your tender LOVE for us all.

My dear sister, we love you, but God loves you best! Goodbye, till we meet again in eternity to part no more!

AKPENE'S REFLECTIONS.....10 DAYS AFTER.

It is my long weekend off from work and that is when Mama and I always talk. Every other Thursday or Friday and sometimes both days.

It hit me again especially this evening that you're not here and that I couldn't call you. That's when we talk of our "BIG" plans. Visiting you with Mark, and how you are supposed to be praying for us to bring you that grand baby you've been asking for.
With you Mama, I didn't have to ask. Your love and prayers for us was a guarantee. I thought I knew the value of that well enough but your passing has brought a whole new meaning to that for me.

Our goal was to make you feel happy, at peace and appreciated but little did we know that God had better plans for you. The greedy girl in me says he took you away from us too soon. I would rather you're here to venture another of your projects. Be it ice cream or yogurt factory. Yup, I don't like it when you bother with all that instead of just relaxing and enjoying yourself. But see, those are the things you enjoyed. We know how hard you worked for years and we just wanted you to relax.

I'm signing off for now but as we always said to each other at the end of the phone conversations "I love you" and now may I add that I miss you dearly Mama..........

THE BURDEN OF TELLING OUR MOM ABOUT GLADYS' DEATH.

Yesterday, Tuesday, was exactly one week when Gladys died.

We have not yet gathered the courage to tell our mother, Adzorwode Attipoe. We, her children, have the onerous burden of breaking the news to her, but we are afraid to do so because we know exactly how she is going to react. So our Mom is still in the dark about the fact that her beloved daughter, Gladys, has died.

Indeed, our Mom was actually living with Gladys at Juapong when this whole thing happened. I remember Gladys, a few months ago, making her own mega plans towards our Mom's 90th birthday which falls next year, 2010, and we were all having a crack at her since both of them were very close. The two of them were literally joined at the hip, so you can imagine how difficult it is going to be to break this news to our Mom. All she knows right now is that Gladys is still at the hospital because she knew that's where she went a week ago. Seriously, very soon, we have to be honest with our Mom!

I also had the courage to break the news to my boss at work yesterday. It will become necessary to travel and, therefore, your employers have to be informed long in advance. When I told him it would be somewhere in the month of October but an exact date had not been set yet, he wondered why the funeral would take that long. To put a little smile on my own face in these very sad times, I wrote back to my boss: "In Africa, funerals are a whole Hollywood production and we take our time to bury our dead". I am sure he broke down laughing at his desk! Yes, it is true. In America, we bury the dead at lightning speed because we have to quickly go back to work. In Africa, it is the direct opposite and the culture is resistant to changing it!

Slowly and slowly, we are putting our heads together to map out funeral plans and I am sure the details will emerge very soon on these very pages. Good morning and good mourning!

TOUCHING WORDS FROM ESTHER, GLADYS' NIECE.

The death of my beloved Auntie Gladys has hit me so hard. The pain and deep sadness I feel is as fresh today, as it was on that fateful Tuesday, September 1st, when my Uncle Peter called from California and had no choice but break the news to me since my mom Lucy was not home. I still cannot believe that I heard him right and that Auntie Gladys (who from this point on I am going to refer to as MAMA since that's how I have called her all my life) is DEAD!

There are very few people in this world like MAMA. Mama was special. My sister Belinda and I lived with Mama for a couple of years. The love Mama showed us was unbelievable. Looking back, I am amazed at how God filled one person's heart with so much LOVE to shower on every one who stepped into her home and beyond. And YES!, her home was always filled with relatives!! There were as many as 18 people in the home at one point in time. The pot we used to cook banku was as big as one normally used in the chop bars. Mama's own children were only four(4) out of the lot, but they willingly shared their mother's love with all of us for years!!

One precious gift Mama gave to me, which I doubt she even knew and I wish I had said thank you to her for, is the GIFT of sharing a family prayer everyday! Ever since I started having my own children, we share prayers as a family every evening before we go to bed. Mama was the one who taught me how to do that. Everyone living under her roof had to gathered before the altar in the living room each morning for us to share a family prayer. It was a must!! Mama, thank you for drawing me closer to God Almighty!!

It was in Mama's house that my sister Belinda and I received the sacrament of Baptism, 1st Holy Communion and Confirmation in the Catholic church. On the day of our Ist Holy Communion, Mama shocked me by giving me her wedding gown to wear for the occasion. I could not believe such show of love by my beloved Auntie towards me!

I miss Mama dearly. There is so much I wish I can say to her but the cold hands of death have stolen my beloved Auntie from me. The last time Mama visited the US, we spoke constantly on the phone. I was going through a very difficult period in my life and, once again, she was there to console me and tell me how God loves me and would see me through. Mama, was going to pay us a visit in Atlanta the next time she came to the US, which we anxiously looked forward to. I cannot believe my children would not meet their precious grandma!!

Mama, I love you dearly and you will forever live in my heart.
May your precious soul rest in PERFECT PEACE. AMEN!!!!!!

HER SON, ELI, CAPTURES THE REAL GLADYS!

As I reflect on Mama’s passing, so many memories flash back. Some making me smile, while others bring unbearable grief.

I recall how she and May kicked off a great relationship, even though they had not met in person. I recall how she always, always asks me “Eli, are you taking good care of your wife?” It meant so much that she always asked that question and I will never forget those words. I recall how she never forgets my birthday, even when I forget myself. I recall when I was little and she said to me: Eli, when you grow up, you should become a priest, a teacher or a doctor. She explained that Jesus was a preacher, a teacher and a healer. And when I become none of those, she loved me anyway. And when our daughter was born, Mama was first on the phone to say, she should become a nun, though I’m sure Nuna has her own ideas, or soon will. Mama was an idealist, and one with big dreams, mega plans and creative imagination, even after retirement. We all encouraged her to take things easy and enjoy her retirement and grandchildren, but her energy level simply won’t allow. She kept going strong.

Mama was a woman of great knowledge and substance. She was well accomplished, over and beyond many women, and yes, men too. She inspired us every step of the way to reach for the stars. She was a shining example that we all had no reason to risk out for new frontiers and achieve. I recall when I was in grade five, still with a year to go to secondary school. Mama quickly enrolled me in holiday classes so I could skip grade six enter secondary school immediately. She meant to do it, and she got it done!!! Not just for me, but also for Divine, a family friend’s child with whom I went to grade school. And when our youngest sibling, Makafui, was in grade three. Mama pulled off a real stunner, that left even those of us who knew her utterly speechless. She succeeded in preparing Makafui for secondary school, making her skip grades four, five and six. Such was the upbringing she gave us. Nothing was impossible for this trailblazer that we had, and STILL have as our one and only Mama.

MY Mama was a giant, both literarily and figuratively. I recall how most of the people who knew her called her simply Mama. Even adult men, who were her seniors. Sometimes, I felt funny when I got older and she would send me to deliver a message to her work colleague or priest or someone of her peer. I usually pondered over how I would call her to the recipient of the message, knowing well my Mama was not quite their Mama. I would arrive and say “Mama says……” And they would respond “Tell Mama ……” How else would I call her, when everyone else called her simply Mama? Because she really was one of a kind.

Mama, we love you and we miss you dearly. Though you’ve moved on, you continue to live, forever, in our thoughts and our hearts. May you rest in PERFECT PEACE.

AND WOEDEM SAID TO HER MAMA...........

Mama:

You are my mother and that is what you will always be. I cant believe you have left this life. Who will love us the way you do? I remember how you always end our conversations on the phone with the phrase "I love you", waiting eagerly for a similar response, reaffirming our love for each other!

Although we had our quarrels, we were always quick to forgive each other.
Your battle with depression made it difficult for us to understand you sometimes, but one thing that was never in question was our love for each other. I remember visiting you in May 2009 and you tried to share with me your emotional problems. I wished I could save you from all these but I did not know how. I advised you to turn to the word of God for strength anytime you are sad or depressed. That was the day I decided to say a prayer for your happiness and peace of mind every morning. On the day of your death, I remember saying this prayer for you, but never did I know that the only way to this happiness and peace of mind is through death. I wish I had done more to help you, but now its too late.

Although I am sad that you could not say goodbye, that now there is nobody to call me on my birthday to wish me the best, I know that you are resting in the bossom of the Lord Almighty.

I love you mama, always.

AKPENE'S VERY FIRST WORDS ON THE DEATH OF HER MOM

Thank you Lord, for giving me this special person all my life; my mother, and allowing her to also be Mama to so many people. I mean, so many.

Your heart, big as a globe. You gave love to all who came your way.
I called your cell phone twice last night mom despite the news of your passing hoping there must be a mistake. I just wanted to hear your voice just one more time Mama. I wanted to hear you say "hello Akpene".

Who is going to pray for me now Mama?
I love you Mom. I'm not as strong as you and will pause for now. I will be back........

Later, she wrote.......
Mama, you did it again today. Your spiritual strength got me at The Grotto on Sandy Blvd in Portland Oregon.

I just had to talk to someone about you. I talked at length with one of the catholic priest about you and showed him pictures of you. He told me you are with God in Heaven. He had a place in his arms just for you and you were right there. Peaceful and happy. After the many years of your services to the Lord, praising him, introducing him to many people and changing lives in many many ways, you are where you always wanted to be. With the Savior. I stayed there long enough to catch the 12 noon Mass which the priest dedicated to you. And guess what else? Your wish for a Mass 3rd Sundays of the month? You got it and it's every Sunday starting Sept 6th 2009 at the same Grotto. These are the things that made you happy and complete I feel honored to help.

I love you so much Mama and I miss you terribly.........

HOW THE NEWS HIT ELI, GLADYS' SON.

Thanks to all of you who’ve actively participated in this blog so far. It has taken me a while, partly because of the emotional trauma of seeing the pictures, reading your texts and reminiscing the times spent with Mama. I finally braved it this afternoon, and those pictures really hit home for me, just as anticipated.

While at work on Tuesday September first in the afternoon California time, I received a call from my wife, May, saying that my sister Woedem had called and wanted to talk to me. I immediately felt this must be important because Woedem and I had earlier the same morning exchanged a series of emails because she was thinking of visiting us, her siblings in Canada and the US. I wondered, why would Woedem be calling, after she and I had just exchanged a bunch of emails? When Woedem broke the news, my heart just sunk. I simply could not believe it. Mama? Noooooo!!! Ohhhhhh!! I broke down and wept like a baby.

After hanging up with Woedem, I gathered some strength and called Akpene, my sister in Portland. She was at work and did not pick up. Next, I called Uncle Atsu, Mama’s brother. Uncle and I speak often, and he usually instantly makes me out by voice. I was clearly so shaken that Uncle could not tell from my voice as to who was calling. After I murmured what had happened, Uncle screamed, obviously in shock and disbelief.

Again, I gathered some calm and went to break the news to my boss, who was also quite a good friend. Yes, I thought I was calm, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. I approached my boss and asked whether he had some time to talk. He offered me a chair. As soon as I dropped in the chair, I was sobbing again helplessly. He was clearly shaken, as he had never seen me like that. It took a while before I could explain what had happened. He comforted me and told me about when he lost his mom. He tried to encourage me to be strong, but that had only the reverse effect. I broke down again sobbing even worse, before finally controlling myself. I thanked him and left his office. The rest of the day was, for lack of a worse word, terrible.

The last time I saw Mama in person was in late 2004, when I paid a surprise visit to Ghana with my sister Akpene. I still recall the utter joy in her when she saw us. I WANT, WANT, desperately WANT to remember her JUST like that. And now, when I think about how I would never hear her youthful voice again, it just makes me feel sick. I now wish I called her every single day, until she gets fed up taking to me.

Mama had not met my wife May, one reason why it hurts so badly. Mama never met our newborn and her granddaughter Nuna, another reason why it hurts so badly. Mama has not even seen pictures of Nuna, as I was still yet to post pictures to her address due to lack of internet access in Juapong. Yet another reason why it hurts to badly. I take comfort in the solid relationship that May had with Mama, though both didn’t recall ever meeting in person back at Akosombo. I also take comfort that Mama heard her granddaughter, Nuna, make sounds over the phone. These priceless moments of interaction between Mama and my young family gives me some comfort, but the thought of never picking up the phone and calling Mama again and again just leaves a terrible, terrible feeling of loss. It is hard to imagine any loss that could trump this one.

SOOTHING WORDS FROM MAKAFUI ON HER MOM'S DEATH.

Mama is what we all called her, because that is who she was. She loved, loved and loved again alas leaving nothing for herself. Mama did not care what it cost to love.

Yes, she was only human as we too are. We quarreled, we yelled, we cried, we threatened and so did she but nothing could break the spirit of MAMA.

We spoke on Saturday. She gave me an unusual call first thing in the morning. She would not say a word to my husband. Her only words were, 'can I speak to Makafui, get my daughter to call me, it is urgent'

Usually, I would not have called her immediately, but as God will have it, I called her first thing when i got up from bed.

She said, 'I am in a great difficulty and I cannot explain it but I need you to pray for me. Ask your priest to say a mass for me on the 3rd Friday of every month - the day of Perpetual Help and ask Eli, Woedem and Akpene to do the same'. I encouraged her as usual, we shared some sarcastic jokes about her being like a 'stubborn child' to us her kids. She was HAPPY. I promised her based on the word of God (not mine) that she will live to see us all back at home with her grand kids and there was going to be a big celebration. She will live in the house she was so much anxious about. And it will be a monument after her own desire. NONE of us (kids, husband, siblings, church, friends, etc) from our human resources (money, time, emotional support) could have offered her what she yearned for. It was beyond physical, she yearned for everlasting peace, love, joy, hope; an everlasting HOME. Only God could and that is what he has given her now.

So I thank God for calling her to rest. And even though HE left us without a Mother to call MAMA, I would rather HE has her now. I mourn because I will not hear her voice again nor will anyone remember my birthday, that of my husband, the grand kids and every single anniversary there is. I will only remember her memory on these days.

Though we wish she had been called in a more opportune time, God decided his daughter had had enough. Her life was worth more to him than it ever meant or would ever mean to any of us. We could not offered her anything to appease her restless spirit. So it must be that at last, her soul never did seem to find rest until now, when she rests with her maker. Indeed our souls shall never rest, until they rest in HIM too.

Mama, so we will definitely be having that party. We will celebrate your life and all that you have given. Though we had nothing to offer you, We were glad to call you MAMA. You loved Jesus and he loved you too. May he be the one to keep you forever.

Bye Mama. We will see you again soon, soon, soon in God's appointed time.

A COMFORTING NOTE FROM MY BROTHER MATTHEW

Hello Atsu,

I pray that you are coping with resourceful strength. Gladys has been my star for so many years. It is quite a shame I have not had the opportunity to let her hear this from me. I tend to entertain this optimistic view of life that keeps me quite laid-back. But look, Atsu, this death has really jolted my consciousness tremendously. Please do not think that it has not shaken me and that is why you have not heard from me. Sometimes it is better not to open wounds, by saying very little.

One very big marker of love that Gladys had etched in my mind that I never forgot is this. I was a little boy moved from Adeiso to live with my grandmother in Keta. In my young eyes, I noticed this tall young lady who always passed through our house selling tea bread. This lady always prepared samples for me. After a while, I asked my grandmother who was this lady always giving me tea bread. That was when my grandmother told me, that is your big sister that you did not know. She added ' you have many big brothers and sisters; you are a rich boy but you don't know yet.

Atsu, you are doing well by keeping us posted. I intend to write an eulogy soon. There are so many high points in Gladys' life. I will try to capture some of them. OK, Atsu, do your best to keep fortified because many young ones are going to need a shoulder to lean on. I will do my part to offer some financial support because there may be a
few of you traveling for the funeral.

Hang in tough, Brother.

Matthew.

THE PAST FEW DAYS AFTER GLADYS' DEATH.

I have been having sleepless nights lately. I go to bed and wake up in the middle of the night, and I think about nothing else but Gladys. Therefore, it is comforting when I get calls or emails from her children. They have all written to thank me sincerely for creating this blog as a forum to keep their mother's spirit and image alive, not only in these very tough times, but FOREVER! They have all made postings to this blog in the comments section but I intend lifting some of those comments into the main posting area for family and friends to read. It all tells you how they are feeling at this time. Horrible! Very sad, indeed!

Apart from close family, I have not had the courage to call any of my friends or extended family. Gladys' children come first, then my siblings and immediate family. The only person outside my immediate family whom I have sent an email to is Dotsei Malor of the UN, my very close friend. Like Eli, I was intimately involved in the purchase of his home also, so it was natural for him to call the moment he got my email. Dotsei, thank you!

I also got a call from my brother John in London, from my brother Wizzy in Ghana, and my cousin David Srogboe-Korshi in Ghana. Guys, I thank you! I got a call from my niece, Akpene, on Friday evening to discuss issues relating to funeral arrangements, et cetera. She had sent an email during the day alerting me about her call. I listened carefully to what she had to say and offered my advice and opinion. By the time it was all over, we were both on the same page, in total agreement as to what to do to send off their Mom in a dignified way. That was very respectful of her and I thank her!

I am doing my best to stay strong and not to lose it completely. In this regard, my sister Lucy has remained my rock! She is a tremendous resource for me in these tough times. Her advice is very soothing. Her strength and maturity are an inspiration for me. Sister Lucy, thank you. I love you! Yes, I have to stay strong and guide Gladys' children in these very difficult times to the point where we all travel to Ghana for their Mom's funeral and burial. I will be strong guys, I promise!

My wife, Hurshe, has been very supportive. She has noticed I am not the same, and she keeps asking repeatedly, "Can I do anything for you?" and I keep resisting, "No, no, no!" Of course, she knows how sad I am deep inside, but there is nothing she can do to stop it! She has been very instrumental in posting all the pictures to this blog so far. Hurshe, thank you!

I intend making a few phone calls today, Sunday, just to keep away from thinking too much. I don't know whom I am going to call yet but I know I will get to it.